Expectations...

I've been thinking a lot about expectations this week. Personally I had a lot of expectations in the past couple weeks with friends visiting, plans, etc. Unfortunately a lot of those expectations were not met. Well, at least I felt unfortunate about it. Now as I'm past those events, I'm reflecting on them in a more yogic way. I know better than to place such value as my happiness solely on these events when I also know that the universe has it's own agenda. And whether you believe that these things happen for a reason or that the general rule is random chaos, it's very unlikely that things will go exactly as planned.

This is what I practice on my mat and teach in my classes. How could I be so foolish in my personal life? Oh right, because I'm human. I guess it didn't help that I didn't get much practice in during this time. It must be time to head back to my mat and practice some asana with no expectations. So many times I have come into a parsva konasana thinking "ok get ready for the crunch in my hip, the burn in my quad". Sometimes it appears as I expected. Other times, I am shocked to discover how open and strong I am.

I see this in my students too. I see the doubt in their eyes when I demonstrate a pose beforehand. Yeah she can do that because she must have been a gymnast in her previous life (I imagine them thinking). Sometimes they are completely founded in their doubt as they are not yet ready for that particular pose and we modify. Other times (some of my favorites, I'll admit) are when I bring someone into a pose for the first time and their expression goes from fear and doubt to amazement. Definitely one of the reasons I teach=)

I don't really like morals or happy endings and I definitely don't want this blog to be like that. I guess these are more like lessons that I myself am learning along with teaching. Coming to our mat is a practice for our body, mind and spirit. One of these practices is letting go of expectations. For whatever reason, these expectations are often not met, instead falling short or exceeding. But if our bodies and minds are aligned with the desires of the spirit then we are free to progress with grace, no longer weathering such highs and lows. From what I've studied and been taught, this is the final limb of yoga, samadhi.